Tired of waiting for the Recovery from Depression that everyone keeps telling you about?

Do You Even Know Who You’d Be Without Your Depression?

Would you like to find out?

 Sign Me Up!

Which Episode of Depression has been your worst so far?

Mine was when I walked out in front of a bus in the central business district of the city I was living in at the time.

No…wait… mine was when I smashed an empty bottle of wine and tried to cut my wrists with it, while I was drunk.

No. Mine was that time when I stayed in bed for 3 days because I just couldn’t stay awake.

No. Mine was that night when I had to get out of bed at 2am to pick up a library book from the floor because I couldn’t stand the thought that it wasn’t in its usual place.

Or maybe it was the time I was absolutely convinced that my best friend was dead, for no reason at all. Or maybe the time everything was going well in my life, and I suddenly started crying and couldn’t stop for a week.

Or maybe…

So many episodes, and so many times I thought “I’ve beaten it this time. I’ll never get depressed again.”

Now, I know, that’s not true.

Now, I know, that the demon Depression is always there, lurking in the background, ready to pounce as soon as I let my guard down a little. 

I know I’ll always have to be aware of it. I’ll always have to be prepared for it. And I’ll always have days when it’s all too fucking hard.

I also know that there’s always a chance it will spring up at me unexpectedly, no matter what I do to stave it off. 

Depression has been part of my life since childhood and as I’m 52 at the time of writing, I know it’s always going to be a part of my life.

Yeah? So?

Bring it, Buddy. Let’s dance.

Because it is a dance, you know.

That very fine balance between enjoying the good days without worrying about when the bad day’s are going to hit and coping with the bad days without letting them overtake you.








I’ve been there.

I’ve tried it all.


  • Therapy
  • Medication
  • Self-help books
  • More therapy
  • Different medication
  • Diet
  • Meditation
  • Crystal therapy
  • Reiki


And Do You Know What Worked?

None. Of. It.

And all of it.



Learning how to manage your Depression in a way that flows naturally for you, is the key to busting open your creativity and finally having that full, rich, life that you’ve always craved.

Since figuring this shit out, I’ve gone on to create my own Creature of Fucking Beauty. I’m writing a novel. It’s a vampire novel about childless women. And yes, I am aware of just how weird that sounds.

Facing up to the fact that I’ll never be a mother was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do and I could so easily have given into the demon and let the Depression win.

Instead, I chose to take all the wisdom I’d learned over the years from my Depression, mix it with this new, extremely raw, pain and alchemize it into a book. My legacy. 

And in the process, I rediscovered the sheer joy of creating.

I found a love for life that I never thought I would again.

I found a reason to get out of bed in the morning. Not only that, an excitement for the day ahead.


That’s why I decided to create

Black Orchid Alchemy

The empowering membership site for folks with Depression who want to be happy NOW, not when or if, the elusive recovery occurs. 


Perfect for humans who want to control their own lives, their own illness and their own future.

Tarot Therapy*Essential Oils*Shadow work*Dream work*Crystal therapy

Sign Me Up

You’ll Get

  • Excited about what’s coming next in your life, without having to force yourself to care.
  • To enjoy the good moments in your life without fear of when it’s all going to turn to shit again.
  • To know that friends and family love having you around even if your Depression makes you think that you’re a burden
  • Be successful in everything you choose to do without having to follow someone else’s treatment plan
  • Have money to do all the things that other people do without guilt, shame or a sense of “I’ll pay for this.”
  • Get, or create, your dream job so that you can contribute to your community in a way that’s meaningful to you
  • Treat your Depression, your way, and in your time (using alternative therapies that appeal to your soul)


Consider this your open doorway to the life you were meant to have before the Depression kicked in.


“This has given me confidence in many of my situations as to how to navigate the ups and downs.”



Here’s What we Offer in Black Orchid Alchemy

  • Seed 1 – Daily shadow journal prompts

    Confront your shadows to take the sting out of them

    Shadows are only frightening when we aren’t aware of them or don’t understand them. Once you confront them, they’re no longer such a big deal and the demon Depression can’t use them against you.

    • Come away with deeper insight into who you are and what matters to you
    • Receive weekly guidance regarding your previous week’s shadow work

  • Seed 2 -Mental Health Tarot Readings

    One video recording every week 

    Weekly mental health Tarot readings for the Black Orchid Alchemy community will be posted every Monday (NZ time). These are done with a spread that I created specifically for mental health issues.

    • Come away with insight and clues into where your focus should be in the coming week
    • Receive a jumpstart in warding off any unwanted emotions or attitudes



Find a community, a passion, fun, and a healthy relationship with yourself so that you can build the life you always wanted.


Seed 3 – Live Zoom Calls

Fortnightly live calls: Relevant topics and Q&A’s

Every fortnight we have a live zoom call when we’ll discuss a particular topic related to Depression. A more general Q&A follows this. Recordings of the calls are added to the content library each fortnight.

  • Come away with new concepts in mental health treatment and new ideas to try for yourself
  • Receive answers to specific questions that have about your Depression and creating a Creature of Fucking Beauty

Seed 4 – ORCHID Power Hours

One hour consultations for individual ORCHID formula advice

You can  follow the process yourself, or you can receive 1:1 guidance to help you work through the ORCHID process. We talk about where you’re at, where you want to be, and how you can get there.

  • Come away with a clear plan that works for you, and only you
  • Receive individualized guidance to follow the ORCHID formula to create your fulfilling and happy life, once a month


“Fiona is the real deal, with the life skills and knowledge to deliver her messages in a truly caring way.”



Plus Bonuses

Content Library

Learn at your own pace, on your own time

The Black Orchid Alchemy Content Library contains pdfs, videos, tutorials, and mini-courses for you to use.  Worksheets and templates get added every week and you’ll find information on many topics as well as practical advice on how to create your CFB.

Members gallery

Display your creature of fucking Beauty (even sell it)

We’ve designated a specific page for member’ to display their creations. You can sell your products or services here or just show what you’ve created to inspire others. This is the place where we celebrate our work and each other’s work.

Members chat


This is a community after all. You can engage with others as much, or as little, as you choose. Our chat is monitored so you’ve no fear of being harassed in any way, and it is a safe space to share whatever and whenever you feel the need to.



Work hours run on NZ time. Email access to Fiona, the Depression Muse. She’s always happy to answer questions and listen to suggestions. She’ll return your messages as soon as she possibly can


You can spend the rest of your life allowing your Depression to rob you of the future you were meant to have. The happiness, the laughter, the love.



You can take control of your life. You can make your own decisions about how your Depression will affect you. And you can finally live a happy life.


Is there a money back guarantee?

Due to the nature of the information in Black Orchid Alchemy, I can’t offer you a money back guarantee. Black Orchid Alchemy is a closed community and I personally vet everyone that becomes a member. That’s because I need to know that you’re ready and willing to do the work that’s needed to make this shift happen for you.

Although you’ll begin to feel the benefits of your membership almost immediately, it takes time to work through this process. In my opinion, you need to commit to at least a year of learning, trying, and testing all of the information and support you find here. 

What if my doctor doesn’t approve?

Let me put this politely, “who fucking cares?” This is your health, your brain, your mind, you can do what you like with it. Disapproval from others is not a reason to not do something.

After saying that, I find that most people disapprove of things they don’t understand. You can try explaining to them what we do here or by all means, ask them to email me and I’ll be happy to chat to them. There’s nothing in this membership that’s illegal or immoral, it’s all safe.


whats a creature of fucking beauty?

My favorite! Your CFB is the thing you create from your Depression. For me, it’s the Vampire novel I’m currently writing. For you it may be your own book, a piece of art, clothing you make, a recipe, a garden plot…the possibilities are endless.

The important thing to remember is that your CFB is how you express yourself. And you use your Depression, in whatever way that works for you, to create that magnificent thing of beauty.

how long will i have access to the information in boa?

As long as you’re a member. If you decide you want to leave the community, your membership will run out at the time of your monthly payment and you will lose access to all of the calls and resources inside.

If you have work on display on the membership site, that obviously still belongs to you so you take it with you when you go. However, I’m 100% convinced you’ll want to stay, once you’re in here!



The Orchid formula is the basic categories that we work on within the Black Orchid Alchemy community.

ORCHID is —————> 

  • Owning your health
  • Reconnecting with yourself
  • Core knowledge
  • Holistic therapies
  • Inspirations & Truth
  • Doing. It. Now.

Within these categories we talk about tarot therapy, aromatherapy, crystal therapy, planning and goal-setting, meditations, managing shit days, self-esteem and confidence building.

We show you the options, how to implement those options and you choose the ones you want to try.


Hopefully, you’ll already have a plan in place for when this happens. And yes, it happens to most of us. One of the things we do in Black Orchid Alchemy is create our own plans for when the shit days happen. All you have to do is follow that plan and get back involved when you are well enough.


We’ve got plenty of support available. You can email me, or any of the team, or you can ask questions in the chat forum. That’s the beauty of membership sites, you’re as involved as you want to be, when you want to be.



You most certainly can. The Budding and Blooming tiers both have specific features and it’s best if you change your tier at the time of your regular monthly payment. That means there will be no confusion as to which tier you’re in and therefore which features you’re able to access.


Oh yes. I have a BA in Psychology, a National Certificate in Mental Health Support Work, and over 25 years work experience in the mental health, alcohol and other drug services. As a support worker, risk assessor and service coordinator.

More importantly, I’ve had Depression since I was 9 years old. The demon and I are old frenemies. I live this shit. Just like you.

Here’s where everything changes for you. 

Help yourself to a virtual cupcake in celebration!


Hi from Fiona – The Depression Muse

The Tiers:

  • Blooming – the affordable option
  • Budding – the even more affordable option

In the next few moments…

You’ll be inside the members only area of Black Orchid Alchemy! You’ll have instant access to the information that’s already in there and ongoing access to the mini-courses, tutorials and worksheets that I upload every week.

By the end of the first month, you’ll be well on your way to your new life. In fact, you’ll probably be experiencing the benefits after our first live call.

Sign Me Up